I would like to think that every trip and adventure you take has buried within some sort of insight or lesson that’s applicable to your life. Of course you have to be open to it cause these kinds of things WILL pass you by. It has become apparent to me that I had to travel to the other side of the world to learn two things in particular. I spent this past weekend in a secluded resort in Wentworth Falls in the Blue Mountains of Australia to take part in the union of two people that are IN LOVE. The ceremony and reception was littered with speeches and tears of love that even if your heart was as black as the night you couldn’t help but well up. There was so much emotion and heartfelt sentiments of love that I could puke. Of course that is my alternative to crying since my heart IS as black as the night, sometimes. Maybe it was because I have been very close to the groom for over 15 years or maybe it was because of my age, but hearing those commitments and watching him tell everyone out loud on a microphone in a banquet room was enough for me to realize that “I STILL don’t know what LOVE is”. No wonder I like that Ray Lamontagne song so much. Lesson #1 check.
MARRIAGE is one of those things that I am sure is wonderful but most of my life I have only heard about how things get complacent and you stop having sex. WTF? So this brought me to my second insight. A Tim Tam is MORE than just a cookie. It took a couple of Australians to teach me that. Evidently, you don’t just put these little delicious cookies in your mouth and eat them. First you bite off 2 opposite corners of the cookie. Then you dip the cookie in milk or tea and suck on one of the corners until the milk enters your mouth.
Finally, with one quick motion, before the liquid falls out of the cookie, you eat the whole damn thing and let the orgasm in your mouth just happen. It is awesome and I don’t even like milk all that much. It is more than just a cookie. Here is to finding out how to bite the corners out of marriage and long-lasting love so that it explodes in your mouth every time.